Aeroman took Lexapro from late 2005 until early 2008. He cites changes in libido as one of the main reasons he finally stopped SSRI treatment. This story was posted in 2012 on the now-defunct cite Paxil Progress. It was re-posted on Surviving Antidepressants later that same year. It can be found here.
Aeroman claims:
“On February 27, 2008, I took the last dose of Lexapro. A month and some change prior, I had asked my doctor to remove me off the drug because of the weight and libido issues I was having, after a 2.5-year use of the drug. I had originally taken it for anxiety and depression and it worked quite well when I was on it. While on it, I was very motivated, excited, full of energy. The best way I describe it to people is I was on an artificial “high”. I began buying things I really didn’t need and stayed up until 2am doing all sorts of creative things in the garage. As stated earlier, my wife gave me feedback one December evening telling me, “Who are you? You aren’t the man I knew before”. It was then that I knew I needed to do something to salvage my marriage, especially myself.
After meeting with the shrink, he told me I needed to taper off 10mg of Lexapro in a month’s time. At the time, I knew NOTHING of withdrawal, especially with the happy state of mind I was at during the drug Tx. I thought 1-month to taper was TOO FAST. Little did I know I was so wrong. Anyway, he had me go from 10mg to 5mg immediately for two weeks and then take a 5mg dose every other day. During this month (Feb 200, I didn’t feel anything different. My last dose was on Wednesday, February 27, 2008. Four days later, on a Sunday, I noticed I was irritable. Very irritable. I am not normally that type of person and I even mentioned it to my wife, “Babe, I am very moody and I don’t know why”. That day, we went to Salsa Dance class and I noticed I was making a lot of mistakes (more than usual). I found myself having issues concentrating. Later that week, I began having headaches (the tight band around the head) and nausea. That lasted off and on for about 2-3 months. After 3 months time, a lot of the physical stuff backed off but I was realizing I was sinking back into the abyss of depression. I had no motivation for anything. My sleep was off as well as my appetite. I began experiencing racing thoughts along with the inner restlessness (which to this day was my worst symptom ever). During June 2008, I also began having low back chronic pain (which still persists to this day). I was losing weight fast (I had gained 50+ lbs on the drug), no appetite, still nauseous, insomnia, anhedonia, suicidal thoughts, continued libido issues, early morning wake up calls (~4am), dizzy/off balance, eye floaters, and other issues I have forgotten. I lost count how many physicians/specialists I went to see in 2008 for all of these ailments.
Thanks to Google, I found the drugs.com forum after entering “Lexapro Withdrawal” into the search box. My jaw fell to the floor as I read the countless stories that others wrote about getting off Lexapro. I knew I wasn’t alone and I finally had a name to call what I was experiencing.
As the months went on, I would have some relief of the symptoms but still wasn’t fully recovered or “myself”. At around Month 26ish, I felt an uplifting sense of inner peace. I began distancing myself from the SSRI w/d forums and reading more into my car restoration stuff and connecting with old friends/family on Facebook. I believe at that point, it is then I felt the next chapter begin for me in this w/d journey of improvement. My wife noticed me funnier, joking more. She found me more peppy and not talking about w/d anymore. My siblings/parents noticed the same thing. I was still hurting inside with issues of anxiety and occasional depression funks but I did realize things were getting better.
At around Month 36ish, my libido went through the roof. I am feeling like an 18yr old again there (and that’s the end of that – there is hope dudes!).
At Month 48 (presently), I find myself 98% recovered and trust me, I practically feel “normal” or “myself” but BETTER. The remaining issues are of course the chronic pain and who wouldn’t feel moody/irritable with that. After multiple MRI’s, the doc’s are finding a smashed (dried up) lumbar disc and they feel that is the source of my problems. At this point, they do not want to do surgery because “once they cut, I could potentially be a back patient for the rest of my life”. They advised me to lose weight. And so I have. At 85lbs lighter, I feel more energy, have wiped out issues with cholesterol and high blood pressure. I am still having issues with the low back but I am going to give it half a year and see if the weight loss will eventually help over time. I still have 15lbs or so to go.
My friends, THINGS WILL GET BETTER. The only thing that has helped me, besides God, is all of you & TIME. By giving it time, I have found inner peace with all of this. Is life perfect? NOPE! Do I still get waves of anxiety and depression? YEP! Am I better in handling them? ABSOLUTELY. Both Anxiety and Depressive bouts are now short lived for me. I know if I ever sink into one, I know it is temporary. It isn’t forever. The Dr. Claire Weekes method for anxiety has been a God Send. Check the book and recordings out if you haven’t done so. I see 2008 as a distant memory and you’d have to pick my brain to have me remember a lot of the details of what I went through in that year. 2009 was no walk in the park either. Know that relief and recovery is around the corner for you. Please don’t think that it will take you 3-4 years to feel better. We are all different and may feel better sooner – it’s just the way my brain decided to heal…and healing continues I am telling you. If any of you have detailed/personal questions, please feel free to PM me. I do pop in here time to time and help when I can. I am by no means an expert in SSRI Withdrawal but I feel I know more about this damn state of mind than your average Shrink out there. My plan now is to pick up where I left off BEFORE SSRI’s, live life with my beautiful wife, have a child, and grow old.
We’ll be in touch my PP Friends…”
